I've wondered where I should even start when it feels like I've been gone so long.
It's been a tough two years. Sometimes I can't even believe it's been two years, back to that day where I really felt my life fall apart. Most of you knew me from scrapbooking, these days I think I've done maybe 2 pages in the last two years. I hope to get back to that, and photography. Little by little I feel myself coming back. I just needed to take some time off for awhile. Put the important things back into priority in my life.
I thought I wanted to make this a photography blog, but now I'm thinking maybe I'll make it a little mix of everything. I love to write, I love connecting with people, people I've never even met, but feel like I know. So check back, and soon I'll be sharing recent photoshoots, and favorite quotes, and things that inspire me.
Losing my marriage was so devastating to me. The fighter in me tried so hard to save it, because face it, no relationship is easy. It all takes work. There's been so many consequences to my kids dad leaving, we live with it every day, and some days are easier than others. In the end though I had to accept that two people are needed to save a marriage. I've had a lot of bathroom floor experiences with God, times I've wondered why over and over, but the heart can be a deceitful thing when we neglect his place in our lives. It takes time to learn to accept things. In the end my faith has become so much stronger, though I know I still make a lot of mistakes and have a long way to go.
In the last year though I've met a wonderful guy, he understands and loves and accepts me. Some days I don't know where I would be without him. I don't think I would want to put up with me and my baggage, but for some reason he always sticks around.
Just yesterday, I cleared out the last of the things in my old house. Oh yeah I just moved by the way ( promise to share new house pictures soon), and I noticed the buds on my magnolia tree starting to bloom. For a moment it made me so sad of the life I was leaving behind, I remember every year how it used to bud and I knew Spring was coming. Every year I would take pictures of the new blooms. Every year it reminding me about renewal and life and the things I was looking forward to. This year I sat there and thought it took on a different meaning.
New Begginings…to really start living life again, I still have all the good inside of me, my kids love, and my passion for life and I'm ready to not be afraid anymore.